Heavy Heart

When you first both discover that love you have for each other,

That whole hearted love,

It’s a miraculous thing.

They’re all you think about

They’re all you wanna do good for

They’re all you want to be amazing for

And the affection is overflowing out of pots in your bedroom

And the flowers don’t seem to die

they live to see new ones.

And then months go by.

Now you’re feeling that light hearted love,

Where the falling part was completely finished and the love is real,

But it’s just sitting there like my grandma does in her chair all day.

Sitting.

Getting older by the day,

Hour,

Minute.

And after all this time with him I find myself being heavy hearted

Not whole hearted,

Not light hearted,

But a heavy,

Sinking to the bottom heart.

The love is so strong,

As strong as it ever was but yet now stronger than it ever could be

And he’s light hearted.

And you’re begging for his whole heart to come cuddle with yours that’s gradually sinking

And you’re over thinking

Every possible move he makes because

You want every one of them to be just for you.

How they used to.

Because you know that your heavy heart is breathing for his every move,

Making sacrifices to see those movements,

And he’s floating.

But you’ll just keep sinking.

-AA

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